Brick Tamland:

"I don't know what we're yelling about!"

"Yeah, I stabbed a man in the heart!"

"Yeah, there were horses, and a man on fire, and I killed a guy with a trident!"

"I ate a big, red candle."

"I ate fiberglass insulation. It wasn't cotton candy like the guy said...my tummy itches. "

"Where'd you get your suit? The toilet store?"

"I pooped a hammer."

"I ate a lava lamp once. It wasn't actually lava."

"(riding a bear) Look, I'm riding a big furry tractor."

"I love... carpet."

"I love... desk."

"I love lamp."

"I love lamp! I love lamp."

"I'm Brick Tamland. People seem to like me because I am polite and I am rarely late. I enjoy ice cream and a nice pair of slacks. Years later, a doctor will tell me I have an I.Q. of 48 and that I am considered mentally retarded."

" I heard somewhere their periods attract bears. They can smell the menstruation."

Ron Burgundy:
"Oop...I almost forgot. I won't be able to make it fellas. Veronica and I trying this new fad called uh, "jogging". I believe it's 'jogging' or 'yogging'. it might be a soft "j". I'm not sure but apparently you just run for an extended period of time. It's supposed to be wild.

By the beard of Zeus!

Knights of Columbus, that hurt!

Son of a bee-sting!

Great Odin's raven!

Brick, where did you get a hand grenade?

I'm going to punch you in the ovary, right in the babymaker.

I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch.

Brian Fantana: I think I was in love once.

Ron Burgundy: Really? What was her name?

Brian Fantana: I don't remember.

Ron Burgundy: That's not a good start, but keep going...

Brian Fantana: She was Brazilian, or Chinese, or something weird. I met her in the bathroom of a K-Mart and we made out for hours. Then we parted ways, never to see each other again.

Ron Burgundy: I'm pretty sure that's not love.

Brian Fantana: Damn it!

It's so hot... milk was a bad choice.