She never really had a chance
On that fateful moonlit night
Sacrificed without a fight
A victim of her circumstance
Now that I’ve become aware
And I’ve exposed this tragedy
A sadness grows inside of me
It all seems so unfair
I’m learning all about my life
By looking through her eyes
Just beyond the churchyard gates
Where the grass is overgrown
I saw the writing on her stone
I felt like I would suffocate
"In loving memory of our child
So innocent, eyes open wide"
I felt so empty as I cried
Like part of me had died
I’m learning all about my life
By looking through her eyes
And as her image
Wandered through my head
I wept just like a baby
As I lay awake in bed
And I know what it’s like
To lose someone you love
And this felt...just the same
She wasn’t given any choice
Desperation stole her voice
I’ve been given so much more in life
I’ve got a son, I’ve got a wife
I had to suffer one last time
To grieve for her and say goodbye
Relive the anguish of my past
To find out who I was at last
The door has opened wide
I’m turning with the tide
Looking through her eyes
Friday, May 14, 2004
A good deal of people have been asking me about my graduation experience, the speaker, what I did, and how it went....so here's a little more in-depth on how the whole weekend went.
Friday the 7th we had our graduation practice at 9 in the morning. The person who thought this was a good idea the night after the Senior Celebration must also have been the same person to make the "free" drinks at said celebreation cost $5. So we go through the hour-long exercise and then Kathy, Becky and I head off to IHOP for some well deserved breakfast. I get home and start packing some more, and my 'rents are already halfway to 'Cuse. The family got in around 4:30 and we hung out at the house for awhile, then went to dinner at Delmonico's, my favorite steakhouse up here, and also home to the best steak I've ever had in my life. For $12 you get their 18 oz. "Delmonico" steak which is second to none. After that I hit up the bars with some friends and went home to get a decent amount of rest before the big day.
Saturday the 8th was my "home college" commencement. So bright and early at 8am I had to be in front of the Hall of Languages to get my picture taken with all the other grads, PhD students and Masters. Then I headed into Schine (our student center which we landed for our commencement...pretty lucky!), for the convocation. That all went well, expect for the dean of my school gave a very inappropriate speech. Very political and it really had no purpose at the IST convocation. Then that night was the Eve of Commencement Dinner in the Carrier Dome. That was all well and good too. Next day the 9th was the actual graduation and here's the speech given by Phylicia Rashad, aka the mom from The Cosby Show, Mrs. Huxtable.
Thank you.
Congratulations and happy Mother’s Day.
Time is precious and short so I'll get right to the point. You asked me to come, so I'm here. And I asked myself, "What could I say to this august body that’s meaningful, and personal and true?” I want to offer this suggestion to you: The best way to live in this world is with a mother’s heart. Yes.
A mother’s heart is brave. A mother’s heart is keenly intelligent. A mother’s heart is resourceful and quick and skilled in action. A mother’s heart is flexible. A mother’s heart is sustained and empowered by the purity of its intention—its soul intention—to see the family through. Yes. And to encourage each member of the family with its diverse, individual personalities. To embrace the family as a whole with love and respect. Unyielding in this effort, the mother’s heart sacrifices its own pleasure for the well-being of the family.
My great wish for all of you is that you would understand that this takes great effort and sustained and renewed commitment, that you would each come to regard this world and all of its inhabitants as your family and that you would embrace it with a mother’s heart.
May all of your days be filled with brilliant sunrises and magnificent sunsets, and may you take the time to regard them. And just like the mother’s heart, may you live in constant remembrance and gratitude for the one who created you. And may good fortune always attend you in all of your endeavors—and tonight may you throw down and celebrate, celebrate, celebrate!
The world that you want to live in needs you to create it. The world that you want to live in needs you to create it. So live in it, and create it with a mother’s heart.
Congratulations.
A much better speech than I anticipated, and honestly from what I know, than others anticipated as well. So the whole graduation thing happened, and I did all the pictures, and said goodbye to a lot of friends. Went out to the bars again that night. And then I got up the next day, and went to class. Yeah doesn't that suck! Graduation was made anticlimactic due to that fact that I've still got these two classes to finish. But that's it...after the 21st of May I'm free to return home, and even though the Writing 307 course is continued online till August 13, I can get the hell out of here.
I really want to, too. I'm tired of Syracuse. It's gotten gorgeous in the week after graduation, proving all the myths that it really warms up after all the students go home. It's been way too hot, and I've had too much to worry about with the whole landlord-court case deal. That went sour as you might have read in the previous post. So as of tommorrow I'm crashing at a friends apartment for the next week. It's a pain in the ass to move, but at this point I'm doing what I've got to do. There's so much on my mind lately, and I really just want to be home in NJ. I actually find myself longing for the streets of suburbia, the Meadowlands, the ten thousand malls and diners, and even the jughandles. Not to mention our drivers are a tad bit safer than those up here. And from what I hear gas prices aren't AS ridiculous as in Syracuse. I miss my friends, and I'm really beyond ready to start my life. A lot troubles the mind and the heart lately, but maybe I just need a change of scenery.
16 straight years of school, with more on the way because I've definitely decided to go for my Masters. That's what this has all led upto, and now it's time for me to make things happen. I think I've made a good start so far. This is only the beginning.
Friday the 7th we had our graduation practice at 9 in the morning. The person who thought this was a good idea the night after the Senior Celebration must also have been the same person to make the "free" drinks at said celebreation cost $5. So we go through the hour-long exercise and then Kathy, Becky and I head off to IHOP for some well deserved breakfast. I get home and start packing some more, and my 'rents are already halfway to 'Cuse. The family got in around 4:30 and we hung out at the house for awhile, then went to dinner at Delmonico's, my favorite steakhouse up here, and also home to the best steak I've ever had in my life. For $12 you get their 18 oz. "Delmonico" steak which is second to none. After that I hit up the bars with some friends and went home to get a decent amount of rest before the big day.
Saturday the 8th was my "home college" commencement. So bright and early at 8am I had to be in front of the Hall of Languages to get my picture taken with all the other grads, PhD students and Masters. Then I headed into Schine (our student center which we landed for our commencement...pretty lucky!), for the convocation. That all went well, expect for the dean of my school gave a very inappropriate speech. Very political and it really had no purpose at the IST convocation. Then that night was the Eve of Commencement Dinner in the Carrier Dome. That was all well and good too. Next day the 9th was the actual graduation and here's the speech given by Phylicia Rashad, aka the mom from The Cosby Show, Mrs. Huxtable.
Thank you.
Congratulations and happy Mother’s Day.
Time is precious and short so I'll get right to the point. You asked me to come, so I'm here. And I asked myself, "What could I say to this august body that’s meaningful, and personal and true?” I want to offer this suggestion to you: The best way to live in this world is with a mother’s heart. Yes.
A mother’s heart is brave. A mother’s heart is keenly intelligent. A mother’s heart is resourceful and quick and skilled in action. A mother’s heart is flexible. A mother’s heart is sustained and empowered by the purity of its intention—its soul intention—to see the family through. Yes. And to encourage each member of the family with its diverse, individual personalities. To embrace the family as a whole with love and respect. Unyielding in this effort, the mother’s heart sacrifices its own pleasure for the well-being of the family.
My great wish for all of you is that you would understand that this takes great effort and sustained and renewed commitment, that you would each come to regard this world and all of its inhabitants as your family and that you would embrace it with a mother’s heart.
May all of your days be filled with brilliant sunrises and magnificent sunsets, and may you take the time to regard them. And just like the mother’s heart, may you live in constant remembrance and gratitude for the one who created you. And may good fortune always attend you in all of your endeavors—and tonight may you throw down and celebrate, celebrate, celebrate!
The world that you want to live in needs you to create it. The world that you want to live in needs you to create it. So live in it, and create it with a mother’s heart.
Congratulations.
A much better speech than I anticipated, and honestly from what I know, than others anticipated as well. So the whole graduation thing happened, and I did all the pictures, and said goodbye to a lot of friends. Went out to the bars again that night. And then I got up the next day, and went to class. Yeah doesn't that suck! Graduation was made anticlimactic due to that fact that I've still got these two classes to finish. But that's it...after the 21st of May I'm free to return home, and even though the Writing 307 course is continued online till August 13, I can get the hell out of here.
I really want to, too. I'm tired of Syracuse. It's gotten gorgeous in the week after graduation, proving all the myths that it really warms up after all the students go home. It's been way too hot, and I've had too much to worry about with the whole landlord-court case deal. That went sour as you might have read in the previous post. So as of tommorrow I'm crashing at a friends apartment for the next week. It's a pain in the ass to move, but at this point I'm doing what I've got to do. There's so much on my mind lately, and I really just want to be home in NJ. I actually find myself longing for the streets of suburbia, the Meadowlands, the ten thousand malls and diners, and even the jughandles. Not to mention our drivers are a tad bit safer than those up here. And from what I hear gas prices aren't AS ridiculous as in Syracuse. I miss my friends, and I'm really beyond ready to start my life. A lot troubles the mind and the heart lately, but maybe I just need a change of scenery.
16 straight years of school, with more on the way because I've definitely decided to go for my Masters. That's what this has all led upto, and now it's time for me to make things happen. I think I've made a good start so far. This is only the beginning.
Thursday, May 13, 2004
Well things have been nuts lately.
I graduated last weekend, and the whole family was up. It didn't feel like graduation and part of that was because the very next morning I had to go to class. I've got 2 classes to finish, one from the 10-21st, and the other from the 17th-August 13 (yeah doesn't THAT suck.
On top of everything else we got a court summons from our landlord on Monday after I sent him a certified letter informing him that myself and a few housemates were staying at the Red House until the 30th of May. He didn't take too well to that. We got ourselves a lawyer and had the hearing this morning. Things did not fare as well as they could have. Great lawyer we had, but the judge was biased, and probably knew Roy from the past. They seemed like they were in bed together. Basically one housemate totally fucked us over by continuing to be destructive the past week and a half. He set fire to a cardboard box in the parking lot which our landlord saw, took pictures of, and used to frame the rest of us. So as of tommorrow, when the eviction stamp will most likely be posted on our front door, we'll have 72 ours to vacate the premises.
Thank God I've got some friends up here who are going to let me crash at their apartment until the 21st when my last day of having to BE here in a class is over. Then I'm heading my ass home. So needless to say I'm not in a great mood lately, and the heat wave this week isn't making things much better. But hopefully things will turn up. I'm looking forward to seeing some friends when I get home, and some other people who I think about daily especially.
New comment system up btw! This one should work amazingly....
I graduated last weekend, and the whole family was up. It didn't feel like graduation and part of that was because the very next morning I had to go to class. I've got 2 classes to finish, one from the 10-21st, and the other from the 17th-August 13 (yeah doesn't THAT suck.
On top of everything else we got a court summons from our landlord on Monday after I sent him a certified letter informing him that myself and a few housemates were staying at the Red House until the 30th of May. He didn't take too well to that. We got ourselves a lawyer and had the hearing this morning. Things did not fare as well as they could have. Great lawyer we had, but the judge was biased, and probably knew Roy from the past. They seemed like they were in bed together. Basically one housemate totally fucked us over by continuing to be destructive the past week and a half. He set fire to a cardboard box in the parking lot which our landlord saw, took pictures of, and used to frame the rest of us. So as of tommorrow, when the eviction stamp will most likely be posted on our front door, we'll have 72 ours to vacate the premises.
Thank God I've got some friends up here who are going to let me crash at their apartment until the 21st when my last day of having to BE here in a class is over. Then I'm heading my ass home. So needless to say I'm not in a great mood lately, and the heat wave this week isn't making things much better. But hopefully things will turn up. I'm looking forward to seeing some friends when I get home, and some other people who I think about daily especially.
New comment system up btw! This one should work amazingly....
