Friday, October 28, 2005

Fark.com forums amuse me too much sometimes. The actor, William Hootkins, who played Jek Porkins in Star Wars: A New Hope died recently of Pancreatic cancer. Here is the choice comments on that story:

I always thought his weight problem reflected poorly on the rebels.
I thought I felt a fat disturbance in the force.
If I ever started a band, I wanted to name them "Eject Porkins."
I always wanted to see some food wrappers fly around if he did a barrel roll.
Stay on target Porkins... stay on target.
The first casualty of the Battle of Yavin. His sacrifice will not be forgotten.
I loved porkins. Why couldn't he hold it? HE SAID HE COULD!!! WHY DID HE LIE!?!?! god take me instead!
Okay, I'm not a Star Wars fan, but since I was a little kid, I've always wondered why they used such a big guy in an X-wing fighter. I mean seriously, what was the reasoning behind that? You'd think his weight would hinder the manuverability of such a spacecraft.
Crash and burn, Porkins. I'll see you again on the big Death Star in the Sky.

from IMDB:

EverQuest II (2004) (VG) (as Bill Hootkins) .... Generic Male Barbarian Merchant, Generic Male Dark Elf, Generic Male Dwarf, Generic Male Erudite Merchant, Generic Male Gnome Merchant, Generic Male Half Elf Guard, Generic Male Halfling, Generic Male High Elf, Generic Male Human Merchant, Generic Male Iksar Merchant, Generic Male Kerran Merchant, Generic Male Ogre Guard, Generic Male Ratonga Merchant, Generic Male Troll Merchant, Generic Male Wood Elf

He was also in Raiders of the Lost Ark, Batman, and a River Runs Through it-not to mention a slew of voicework.

RIP Porkins we miss you.
LOL George Takei has told the world he's boldly gone where no man has gone before...he's gay.

I'm shocked. Next thing you know Richard Simmons is going to come out. (Or take that one to the grave lol)

Oh George we kinda knew already lol.
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And of course all the news stories used the gayest photo of him they could find...
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Thursday, October 27, 2005

Oh my God....we had a hit film! What do we do now? MAKE A CRAPPY SEQUEL!

(As far as I know these are all authentic)

Van Wilder Deux: The Rise of Taj
The Santa Clause 3
Underworld: Evolution
Rush Hour 3
Rocky VI
Resident Evil: Afterlife
Rambo IV
Like Mike 2: Street Ball
The Net 2.0
Mrs. Doubtfire 2
Jurassic Park IV
I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer
Basic Instinct 2: Risk Addiction

And they're making a slew of REMAKES too:

Back To School
The Evil Dead
He-Man
Logan's Run (THIS could actually be cool)
Police Academy (WHY GOD WHY)
Porky's
Revenge Of The Nerds

Movies based on TV, games etc:

Get Smart (Steve Carrell as Maxwell Smart? Could be a winner)
Metroid
I Dream Of Jeannie
Curious George (Will Ferrell needs to stop)
The A-Team (Only if Mr. T is in it)

Look them up on IMDB.com if you doubt or dare.
Top 10 Things To Yell Out During DOOM, The Movie:

10. How do I bring up the console?

9. Teh Rock is a n00b.

8. Dude, that hurt. The health is behind the crate!

7. Team kill!

6. This new engine rules.

5. Crap map.

4. This AI is so &%$!ing lame.

3. (as the credits roll) That last boss sucked.

2. #^$!king camper fags!

1. Shit, how do I skip this cut scene? This !@$*ing sucks, it's been going on for like 30 minutes.

HAHAHAH lol. From A Boy And His Computer blog.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Wow Jennifer's ready to pop too!

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Civil rights heroine Rosa Parks dead at 92. Will ride in the front seat on the bus to Heaven.
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