Some Fark posts concerning the Katie Holmes/Tom Cruise engagement had me cracking up:
"It's simple... Tom Cruise used his clear level scientology powers to brainwash Katie into thinking she was a man in love with Tom Cruise. Katie soon to rip her face off, reminiscent of Mission:Impossible, to reveal she is really, Nicole Kidman."
"Xenu must be proud."
"f*ck L. Ron Hubbard and all of his clones" (Tool Aenema reference lol)
-Odds they'll see a divorce court in the next 5 years: 97%
-Odds they'll see a divorce court in the next year: 45%
-Odds that Katie will have a revelation and decide that Scientology is for nut bags about that same time: 98%
-Odds that they'll have any children that are not adopted: 5%
-Odds that Katie will get stuck caring for any kids they adopt after the divorce: 92%
-Odds that all this is about Tommy Boy's desire to look straighter and Katie's ambition to land potential Oscar winning screen roles and not about love: 65%
-Odds that Tommy Boy's exs are shaking their head and laughing: 100%"
"Katie, stop. You're giving the state of Ohio a *worse* image."
Oh Tom...can't I have the old Mission Impossible Tom back?