Know this:

If there are two pillows,
and one is soft while the other is scratchy and a bit too large.
I will sleep take the scratchy one.
If there are two chairs,
and one faces the ocean and the other faces the stairs.
I will turn my back to the ocean.
If there is a lightly buttered piece of toast,
and the other is black.
I will scrape it.
If there is an umbrella and an old newspaper.
I will open it to the sports section and lay it over a puddle.
If there is a rock and a smooth place.
I will sleep crooked.
If there is pain to be had.
I will swallow it whole.